Tuesday, December 30, 2008

Introducing Sim Sim







let me know if this is working for any of you

Thursday, December 25, 2008

And to all...

Merry Christmas... and to all you non Christmas supporters enjoy your December 25th. I've only got a little bit to type before i go to work ... yeah some of us have to work on Christmas day ... and some f us are also getting time and a half. So lets make this quick. grades came in... i got : 2 B's, a C, an INC, couple of S's, some 12's and a two pair queens high. but apparently that's a lot better than i thought it was. I'm not on academic probation. my final project for Moonsik's digital film and technology class is up on you tube. i can use this space to make excuses for all the things i feel are bellow my capabilities. first of all it was severely rushed that's why there is no music in it at all, and also why there is a planet that is literally a circle with its name written on it in front of an ms paint star scape. I'm not going to post it here but i will put the link, because it actually fills the new wide screen youtube boxes also of the page you can click "watch in HD" but for some reason the HD version of the film drops frames and looses 30 seconds of footage by the end, which makes the audio and video not match up at all. any ways:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VTEq0hkl-Hs

well any ways i got 2 and a half weeks till school starts again and the things i need to write while home include : bad genetics skit, script fro falcon film festival, new draft of hobo show (still don't know what i want to do with it) and a police report explaining why i snapped working Christmas day at a gas station when some asshole complained that they didn't get their 2 cents off of gas. you'd think people would be nicer this time of year, but they are even more asshole-ish than ever. oh well, i need the money and at least this job doesn't leave my mouth numb. I'm of course talking about when i became a test subject for dentistry students.

What I'm listening to:
Video game commentary, it is the funniest stuff I've ever herd. these people take it so seriously and if your lucky they have funny accents.

Monday, December 15, 2008

Remember when you were young and naive... and you thought the internet would never run out

each and every day more and more people beg me .. "Simon, Simon... for the love of everything cute please update your blog or I'll kill myself" and it only took 3 of them going through with it to actually get me on here. well that's a lie ... I'm only here case i don't want to start working on finals stuff and the internet is empty of fresh content ... i was searching random people i know from school in Google and it turns out a lot of them also keep blogs... blogs which i am to lazy to read and haven't been updated in months, but still. now here is why this upsets me (and I'll get to my professional update in a minute) Friday during my weekly buffet club meeting, I'm one of the founding AND fattest members, my "friends" pointed out to me that i may exhibit a lot of common traits with a conventional social subset known most commonly as "hipsters." i have never thought of myself as a subscriber to the hipster identity nor any other identity (besides hopeless romantics and fat people) and it bothers me that i can be classified as a cliche'. but the more i thought about it, the more i think ... wow almost everybody i associate with has a blog, and hipsters are known for trying not to be hipsters, and according to my once again quotation-marked "friends" i have a messenger bag which is apparently something only hipsters have... seriously ... i though messenger bags were normal. i thought further and realized, I'm a film major, who writes, and is obsessed with going to New York... God damn it ... its very depressing. but any ways ... i cant let this affect how i run my life, cause then I'm trying to not be something which is just as bad or worse than trying to be something, so i figure all i can do is slowly work more polo's into my wardrobe. my blog has also been called to wordy, so i guess I'll try and get to the point.

professionally I'm exactly where I've been for months. head full of ideas, no time to put any of them together because I'm to busy procrastinating things, and dreaming that one day i wont be procrastinating. but supposedly I've got things coming together down the pipeline. Greg and i have briefly talked about when we're filming the hobo show... looks like probably next fall giving me all summer to get the scripts just right which i will need since i keep reformatting them every time i get them together (I'm thinking about going back to 6 episodes). and the bad genetics stuff is finally smoothed out enough that i might actually get a chance to write something. also been putting some recent thought into my self published poem / comic book idea. i guess I'm going to have a sequel to Space Force Five up sometime this week, but really ... don't get excited about it. it was just for a class assignment to show that i can edit split screen and put "lazers" over footage.

started looking for summer internships, so anyone with connections now is the time to pass them along to me. I'm going to be in new york for the summer, one way or another. and i'd like to be getting school credit for it. ones I'm looking at include: writing assistant for the Connan O'Brien show, development for comedy central, and suppream overlord of the east coast. other incredibly delusional suggestions welcome ... (realistic ones will be accepted begrudgingly)

well my attention span for writing these things is really short and I've been at this for over 4 minutes now ... so I'm going to go take a nap and wake up to watch some more TV before i play some online games and maybe eventually get to finals papers.


oh yeah what i'm listening to :
lets go with Tally Hall, they are a semi-successful band out of Anne Arbor Michigan (20 minutes or so down the road from me) but their videos are amazing and they are producing a web show that has a new episode every other Monday on their website www.tallyhall.com

Sunday, November 9, 2008

and it's been awhile.... since I could... remember the rest of those words to that crappy song

yeah right, so its been something like a month sine i posted anything... my bad. but you know i want to keep this for info about my pre-career work, and I've been pretty fully devoted to my school work. lame i know. I'm sure my hiatus has discouraged both of my readers so there really is no point in me doing this anymore. but just like film school not having a reason to do it is apparently good enough for me.

So yeah, pre-career stuff. my hobo show has been seriously pushed back due to various reasons including a complete overhaul of the format. so hopefully I'll get a chance to work on that over winter break.

I also wrote a script for major event (a bgsu film major requirement in which all film majors pretend they have a good idea and allow themselves to let people they don't know criticize it) the basic concept of which was, besides shit i have to have a script under 10 pages, that a good guy is walking down the street with a bad guy and they bad guy gets hit by a car. deep i know. but I'll never do anything with that; unless professor Vasquez asks then i turned it into a script competition and had it WGA registered.
Also scripts for Bad Genetics are coming and going. with our serious upheaval in the amount of short sketches we're doing this year we have been needing a goat load of scripts and while I'm trying to sit back and let other people, under my mighty reign as co-head staff writer, get their chance to produce their scripts, I'm still getting a lot of time to help out on shoots. i was producer-ing some of them but I've decide to go back to my roots and blow all my money on uselessly obscure dvds. so yeah, Simon is poor again. So don't ask me for money... I'll ask you.

since i feel like after so long i need to post more I'm going to come up with a project on the fly and tell you I'm working on it. the idea is that a fat guy asks the girl of his dreams to marry him and she says she wants him to get healthier. and he feels like he is being asked to change his subcultural identity and decides that it is a terrible thing to ask someone to do so he leaves her and lives his life alone and sad but content that he knows who he is. its a heart warming drama with a significant ideological meaning, but it stars a fat guy so everyone will think its a comedy. seriously i was watching heavyweights the over day (one of the dvds i blew my money on) and the film which i recalled as being the most powerful statement about fat culture being something to be proud of, was still telling fat people that they have to change. i want to make something that praises the delight of cellulite. as someone who is a white man with nothing else to cling on i take it very serious. what makes being fat as a subculture great is that anyone can join, but at the same time the most successful fat people lose their fat. but what ever, your probably just looking at this and thinking "wait Simon is proud of being fat? what a delusional blubber burgling fatty McPork sandwich. but yeah ... that script will never get made.

starting to kind of look for internships i know i have to do one this summer and I've already got an offer to be roommates with someone in NYC who might have just been trying to be polite. but if that's the case I'm still going to guilt my way on to their lease.

scheduled for classes for next semester and I know i just said i wouldn't talk about personal things right before going into a fat person rant, but its kind of related in that i found out that i can only take 2 more film classes until i graduate in a year and a half(and yes I'm stocked (stoked... have i been spelling that wrong for years?) to find out that i can still graduate on time... thought i fucked that up). but yeah most of the rest of my time here will be to complete my creative writing minor which i thought about changing but have recently decided against. i hate to admit it but poetry is pretty fun. even though focusing my minor on fiction might help me more i might focus it on poetry so that i don't have to read as much. and so i can be more pretentious... who doesn't love being pretentious.

so i guess that's all now for what I'm listening too:
The Top by Francis and the Lights... perfect for people who want a white Prince

Tuesday, October 7, 2008

MAC ATTACK

Got my iMac in the mail today and i am making my first post from the non windows world. since i have time while all kinds of programs that i may or may not need are updating and doing whatever it is programs do while no on is around ... drink i assume. any ways, THIS THING IS SO BAD ASS! i wish i could have sex with it... but i didn't buy that upgrade. speaking of for you nerds out there its the 20 inch 2.66 ghz with 2 gb ram and 320 gb hard drive. thats all for now i've got cool person things to do.

Sunday, October 5, 2008

crazy busy

sorry guys... but i am just way to busy as of late to post stuff. our 48 hours film which was this weekend fell apart and I've got about 3-4 scripts to write for various other stuff. papers and stuff too. I'll try to post some more details on why my life has been crazy hectic sometime... but not to soon.

Sunday, September 21, 2008

I was just told by a psychic that I am going to be alone for the rest of my life.... fuck!

So the show... was looking it over and thought ... "wait a minute, I have done nearly enough re-writes to this" so guess what guys... BACK TO STEP ONE! Two major reasons why I'm going back to the script, both have to do with money/resources... go figure right? The first and easier to explain is that like a dip shit I thought, "well, I’ll just write it how you want it and I won’t take into account the fact that I can't actually build a set and have to write everything for on location shooting". So that resulted in me writing most of it an elaborate set, well, not really elaborate but just expensive enough to not be able to do and just critical enough to not be able to change it. So that has to be different. But that would not in itself constitute an entire re-hauling of the script, however.... as I said before this was going to be a set of six 20-40 minute episodes kind of like a British sitcom (brit-com for those not in the know), only with characters you can understand. but alas, I have decided in my infinite wisdom that that really would be a lot of fucking work... and just shooting a pilot would not do it for me... its not really an episodic thing, despite the fact that I’m writing it in episodes. So what I’m thinking now is to take the main points, keep the funniest characters, re-tool the plot almost entirely and whittle it down to three 10-20 minute episodes. Because a half an hour to an hour of content is a whole hell of a lot more reasonable than two to four hours of it. Sorry guys I am in college remember that....but in a lot of ways I think this will make it better, because before I really only had a solid plot figured out for a few episodes and then directions I wanted to go with for the others... but I sat down this week and basically plotted out the entire thing. So it's a lot more of a solid concept right now. however I’m not entirely sure when I will get the chance to type this thing up, because now that I’m back in classes (even though I’m down to 12 credit hours) I still have butt-loads of things to do... things like watching all six star wars movies at Dustin’s house. (watching the last one tomorrow) and also hiding in my room and getting super excited about the Emmys which are apparently Sunday and I didn't know till I saw Joey Fatone on the TV guide channel pimping his red carpet interviewing skills. So I’d better go to bed so I can wake up and watch things tomorrow ... man is my life exhausting.

Currently listening to: Smash Mouth Astro Lounge

Sunday, September 14, 2008

nothing new to report

still waiting on notes for the script, I'm trying to decide between trying to film just the pilot or being a dick to everyone who offered to help and trying to write all 6 episodes and film them all at once. based on the way i wrote that sentence you can guess which way I'm leaning. in other news I've been getting increasingly better at the ancient oriental art of pseudo-quw (sudoku) and I'm likely to get my loan money in a couple of weeks... so yeah nothing but excitment on this end. lots of homework for my classes which i still barely feel like i'm in. alread missed a couple of assignment... wow i need to get back into school mode. my hearts jsut not in it yet ... i'm in fact so apathetic right now that i'm not even gongi to spell check this and make sure that every "i" is an "I" despite how much i like having things that refer to me, Simon Koch, capitalized... what ever i'm done.

listening to: Madness - one step beyond

Monday, September 8, 2008

got to make this quick

So, I know... I fucked up. But I'm going to skip the apology and just get down to business. The script is typed... only 2 weeks after I said it would be. Now that I’ve got it out I can start the long laborious process of revising. Kind of like when you have a child and you know that you're going to raise it to be a decent human being... but unlike my real kids I’m not going to let this script slip into a life of gang warfare. Just kidding ... Harvey isn't in a gang. So I sent it over to the co-producer who unfortunately for you will probably be the only one to see it at this time. Fucking deal with it... unless I need more advise and you are an accredited reviewer of TV show pilot scripts... like me. So that’s about all for the business for now... music thing in the tag but you'll get there eventually.
So now, let me explain a few things that have been restricting my ability to produce things faster. School is a bitch, especially when you don’t have money for books. And for the first time in my career as a student I’m actually in classes that I need to read the books for. Dick move life... dick move. also I’m currently about a week late on my rent without the money to pay it... thank god my roommates are also deadbeats and can't pay their third otherwise I’d feel bad. campus fest was last Friday where I got to bounce between the UFO booth and the Bad Genetics booth... in all I had a good time hanging out with fellow org-ers, but I really have nothing to say to freshman about joining either of the groups... they know their not going to come to all that shit they sign up for... I didn't. And I know that’s not what campus fest is about, and hopefully I won’t be visited by the ghost of campus fest spirit. I’ve had some terrible past campus fests. Any ways, I’ve started my creative writing classes and damn I got a lot of non-script stuff to write (including 2 stories by tomorrow that I haven’t started or thought about yet) so between school, and career problems I’m about as relaxed as....uhhh something that’s not that FUCKING RELAXED, GOT IT!

So for background noise I’ve been going through TV shows in my collection, starting with undergrads, and I just finished up mission hill, so of course clone high is next.... I’ll probably continue in that order for a while. in one of my writing classes I over herd some of the pretentious nerds who studies that crap full time say that they recently re-read a book for the fifth time and I instantly looked down on them... then I realized I’ve seen the entire run of Futurma at least 5 times. So that made me feel shitty, but whatever we're all nerd in some way or another. Except me... and people who act exactly like me I suppose. What ever it's late and I’m being incoherent and I’ve got tons of shit to do still so lets wrap this up

So (just had to throw that in to make it so every paragraph started with so) music I’m listening too: besides some Travis Morrison, Metro Station and Cyndi Lauper, I found this band off the front page of you tube called Noah and the Whale. pretty good but what’s funny and also relates back to the show, this particular song I’m linking you too sounds very VERY similar, in the types of instruments and general feel to what Mr. William Hooper and I had planned for the theme song... but just remember, we are not stealing this sound because we had it figured out before I even heard of this band, so now enjoy ‘5 years time’, and what may possible be the first look for most of you at the tone (musically anyways) that I’m hoping to set in my show… unless the fact that it’s to similar gets to me and I make Hoop dog (sorry, Will) redo it from scratch.


Sorry if you were hoping for something more gritty

Sunday, August 24, 2008

Opps

Ok so i meant to say something in the last blog but i forgot... the excellent film "Fortune Cookie" directed by Emily Berens, D.P.ed by that Steve guy i spoke of, and written by me, is up on you tube... so please take a moment to enjoy

State of the Simon Address: Third quarter report ... not really, just a normal blog

Sorry, I know I missed last week’s entry... unless you count my Friday post about leaving my hometown, which I don't. So what have I done with my first week after returning to the BG lifestyle? Well, really, not much... a lot of caching up, and if I haven't made it a point to see you and you’re located in the BG area please get at me as soon as physically possible. But enough making the people I'm avoiding think I’m not actually avoiding them, let’s get to business.
Script is getting typed ... I'm hoping to wake up early tomorrow and finish it up then go through on a rough first revision. But since I'm probably not going to wake up until 3pm, that might not happen. but I’m on my word of allowing anyone who reads this the opportunity to slap me in the face and such if I don't get it done by Monday* (*Read SFK:B #5 - Straight up business... in my pants) on the production front though, big news. A lot of my major crew roles have been acquired. Some of them might not remember it because they agreed to it while drinking at Theresa's party Friday night. But whatever it’s on the internet now so it’s official and I'm holding them all too it. Starting with local (sort of) film Guru Steve Hildreth as D.P. Mark Huber as Head/Only Editor. And coming in as producer / pre-production bitch, Greg Mullin. ohhh and directing.... well me of course... SUCK IT!
But let me say something about the newly confirmed producer of the Untitled Simon Koch project, Greg Mullin. Some of you may be thinking "well wait a minute I want a cool job like that working with one of my all time greatest film making idols, Simon Koch, how come this schmuck gets to do it." well let me answer that by offering you folks a link to Greg's New Blog : There's Got To Be A Better Way. I would sincerely recommend it to any fans of this Blog... because if you like hearing me talk about how awesome I am, you're sure to like someone else talking about how awesome I am. And if anyone else wants to post internet content describing how I've positively influenced your lives... there’s still a lot of cast and crew positions available.
So anyways, classes Monday, at like 9:30... AM! I know ridiculous. But I've got a pretty nice schedules with classes that should help my to better serve you, the future super fans of my work. Well all except anthropology... but you know gen-eds. other than classes I've got all my roommates moved in now... pretty cool bunch of people. Jeremy, Libby, Mike, Jackie(y?), some dogs, some ferrets, and some turtles. If it came to it I wouldn't mind being abducted by aliens and forced to compete against other houses in various physical and mental abilities... although the true meaning of the test would be about teamwork… but you all knew that.
Well that’s all for now. See you next Saturday night/ Sunday morning... fuck... its 6 am.

Music I've been listening too: (yeah still doing this)
I bought the Justice album "t" and its really good, especially "The Party". Also I've been listening to the following song a lot more than usual. It’s Start Over by The Abandoned Pools… enjoy.

Friday, August 15, 2008

I say this with the kind of sincerity that only Chris Martin can express

Bainbridge, I'll miss you. go ahead and put on homecoming by Kanye West and pretend its about you and from me... then put on Kanyes work out plan, just because that a cool song. Lates hometown people.

Sunday, August 10, 2008

What if I, hypothetically, didn't want to think of a creative title?

I bought this camera at a garage sale. It's a 16 mm Keystone B-1. I tried loading in some of the extra 16 mm film I had lying around my room, but it’s apparently more complicated than I thought, or it's broken. Either way, if any of my experienced readers have any knowledge on the Keystone B-1 16 mm film camera, please let me know.

So, Anyways. Script is coming along, revising and all that; also I don't think I've actually done anything with it. But I have been giving what little time I can spare to other show aspects. Aspects that may seem ridiculously premature to even start thinking about at this stage in the process, but aspects none the less. I talk of course about the one thing that either makes or breaks all sitcoms; you got it, the theme music. me and my talented composer, Will Hooper sat down the other day and hammered out what will become the first 30 to 45 seconds of each episode... audibly anyways... unless I put in cold opens... not that I expect you to know what cold opens are... whatever its just semantics. but yeah, the very talented Mr. Hooper worked with me and my terrible backwards hypocritical way of describing what I want to try and figure out just what the tone and melody should sound like, as well as preparing an orchestral slew of sounds that come together to form the beautifully junky representation of my half-houred hobo hilarities... have I told you the show is about hobos. Anyways. Now that the immense pressure of figuring out a theme song is off my mind I am free to more clearly envision my Frankenstein-ish creation. So now let’s move on.
I don't know if any of you have heard of this new thing the world has offered us tech savvy individuals. No it’s not mmorpsg's (massive multiplayer online role playing sex games), it’s Podcasts. Yes, only a half a decade after their widely popularized, do I discover that that techno-babel actually translates to "free videos about things I might actually care about". One in particular I have recently "subscribed to" (in layman’s terms that mean I've signed up to get them on a subscription like basis) is Indy Mogul - DIY Film making. These guys get me; they basically post videos on how to make cheap video equipment and how to trick an audience into thinking their watching something good. Its like having my own downloadable Steven Hildreth. (This joke is exclusively for the 2 people who will both read this and know who Steve Hildreth is... one of which may in fact be Steve Hildreth). The only problem is that for some reason my versions of their podcast files are all botched up and look terribly distorted. This wouldn't be as much of a problem if the point of the show didn't frequently rely on showing slight differences between visual footage. Maybe it's fate telling me to get out of film making before I waste more money, or maybe it’s the result of trying to download all 47 back-logged podcasts all at once.
And speaking of money, what's the deal with that... like seriously I've been working full time, you'd figure I'd have some left over. It’s not like I spent hundreds of dollars on useless things that I may never think about after 5 minutes of owning them, and speaking of, I just bought Zoolander on dvd... but only because I couldn't find Night at the Roxbury’s. I'm looking into loans and stuff now, done with work for the summer job, getting ready to move back up to BG next Saturday. And I'll tell you what, I'm jonesing for some king buffet, max facts. (Tell me when "max facts" catches on… it means like seriously.) So I guess this is the last blogtry until I'm in BG. so from Bainbridge this is Goodbye... or to Bainbridge this is ... what ever. Bye.

Also I miss the MySpace blog function of posting what I’m listening to so I’m just going to start telling you afterwards what was happening in my headphones as I typed what is easily $5 worth of comedy. This time it was :

Last Years Model, ok band, but I think it’s an angry beavers reference, so that makes it sound even better.

Sunday, August 3, 2008

I think news anchors favorite stories have to be about exotic snakes that go missing.

So it's Saturday night. Woo. To celebrate I bought the first season of the Ricky Gervais show on iTunes, even though I've heard clips of most of it, I felt I should own it. Also I bought some movies today, Spiderman 1 and 2, and King Kong. They were used and really cheap, but the point is I'm quickly burning through all the money I've saved up through the summer. Actually I'm soon to stop bringing in money, going into my last week of work. So that'll be fun. Fafsa finished, now I need to get a loan for a computer and to make sure I have money for rent and stuff.
Wow... this is boring crap. I kind of feel like this blog should be about Simon the writer/director/ everything else cool, not Simon the student/ gas station attendant; and since I didn't work on my script or other cool stuff, I really don't feel like I should keep talking. Also I can’t concentrate while listening to this hilarious Gervais show. Sorry. I'll try and get something worth talking about done by next Saturday.

Sunday, July 27, 2008

Blog Entry, I CHOOSE YOU!

So I finished the first draft of my script, it looks really good too. I don't mean that literally because it’s still in my hand writing and that wouldn't even look good to someone who's drunk and dyslexic. But it’s got everything I want in it, action, drama, comedy, even more comedy. Well actually it’s not that action packed, and the drama in it is about at dramatic as an emo tween yelling at his parents. But it’s got comedy. Now I have to begin the process of taking it from hilarious to uproarious. Something I'm confident I can do, if not for ... the distractions. Yes as of late there have been many things distracting me, and taking me even further away from my ideal situation of being locked in a room with a word file for 18 hours a day. These menial actives include but are not limited to getting ready to go back to school, refilling financial aid, applying for loans, paying my first months rent, and I know some of you may disagree with me on this, but work sucks. My cover job as a gas station attendant has been getting worse and worse. I no longer have any third shift nights which were the reward for putting up with all you annoying ass customers in the day. And no, I can't do anything about "those crazy gas prices", and I also don't care if it’s a third of a cent cheaper at some station 20 miles from here. I was considering leaving early to spend an extra week doing nothing, but as much as it pains me I really need that one last check so when I go to college I can put of getting a new job for slightly longer. All and all though I think I'm ready to be done. summers been a hoot, you know bumming rides off people and working full time, but I'm ready to start my 8 course semester that also includes 2 positions on campus groups. Wait... wtf? 8 courses and 2 positions? Am I insane? I guess when I fail out I'm going to have to open a used car store with deals so insane it goes beyond funny and you feel so bad for me you're guilted into buying an SUV. but in all seriousness, I have 3, 3!, 0 credit hour courses this year, 4 if you include all the 046's I need to make up (I guess that’s a joke for Bowling Green film people who know what 046 is). And if I may make one more complaint about school really quick, with 8 courses only 1 of them requires books. 1 class worth of books? woohoo, right? NO! Mother f'ing English 2_0_something has $200 worth of books. $200! FOR ONE CLASS! JESUS TITTY SUCKING CHRIST! If the instructor is that strict about having so many books I can only fear the worst... that he's going to expect me to actually read some of them. I didn't go to college to pay loads of cash on books.... or did I? I guess other than that I'm also starting to look for my internship for next summer. Cause if there’s one thing film school has taught me so far it’s that film school is worthless and all that counts is your internships. well now that I'm good and angry at not having enough money I need to try and sleep so I can wake up and be at work in 5 hours, which isn't going to happen because I woke up at 6 pm today ... don't look down on me I'm still used to working third shift. Later, Bill Hader.

AND NO! I didn’t use any paragraph breaks…. I hope it pissed you off.

Saturday, July 19, 2008

Straight up business.... in my pants

So, I'm writing a pilot. Old news, right? Well I'm going to let you all know about the progress, not the content just yet, but believe me it's good. Revolutionary almost. ok, sorry. so I've been filling out a spiral notebook with all the pre-text, you know; character evaluations from 4 different angles, arch conceptions for each of 6 episodes as well as a set of 4-5 interlocking series long stories, production notes from casting choices to ideas for music scores (thanks Will). But that’s nothing I haven't done for my other "pilots"... its in quotes because they never actually got written*. BUT... once I was satisfied with all that fun stuff, I actually started writing out the script. Now keep in mind when I say I wrote it out, I mean like on paper and in pencil. This means that to the untrained eye it looks like somebody ripped 5 legs off an ant and followed its tortured death run onto 50 pages of college rule.
I've got about a half of three fourths to three half fourths and a half of it finished, in laymen terms about 2-3 scenes left. Now it may not be my best writing ever, but by the time I re-write it out on a word file it will be. Honestly, I've cracked up at certain scenes over and over again. And I know that’s not saying much from a man who has stared at himself in the mirror for 2 hours straight. Clearly I admire myself... almost enviously. But this is some legit comedy here.
Now I don't work tomorrow, I could spend this time finishing up the rough draft, or even starting to type it out, but I thought you'd all want to hear form me instead. So it’s your fault if I don't get it done soon. But seriously I'm getting focused on this. A lot of you may know the way that I like to motivate myself best is with fear, specifically of pain. So I'm offering up this guarantee, if by the first day of classes at BG (Aug. 25) I don't have a version of the pilot typed up that I'm willing to show people than you can slap me. Across the face. 3 times. Only on that day, and you have to mention this blog first, otherwise I might have to run up on you with my crew (Hector). But seriously, i'ma get this done.
Moving on to the next step of the process. I need people who want to help me make this. People like co-producers, sound engineers, video editors, someone with a camera, script coverage ... whatever. Now I know you don't want to commit to something you haven't seen and which might be crap. But if you want to be considered for any kind of role you think you can manage, get at me. At the very least leave a comment here. And just remember, I will be famous. and when you come up to me in the future and say "oh Simon, you're so famous and rich, and only you can offer me that opportunity I've been looking for to help accomplish my dreams," this might be the deciding factor between me saying "sheeet, aint no thang" or "help, this homeless person who maybe looks familiar is assaulting me"

thats it for now, maybe next time I'll talk about something you care about. j/k you care about this.

* read all about it in "The Simon Koch: Origins"**
** not real***
***yet

Monday, July 14, 2008

did you know i sleep with 5 pillows?

so i had a recent conversation with everyone in my home town about "when are you getting your band back together?" the answer is no. but, it did remind me about the good times that were had. one thing in particular has come to mind and stayed there the past few days, a song that i (mostly) wrote the lyrics to called Fossil Fuel that goes:

I'm a little man with a crooked face,
I lost my love in outer space.
she said she's gone but i think theres more ,
I lost my love to a dinosaur!

When we die we turn to gasoline (x4)

When i first saw her i had a bone,
but that wood has turned to stone.
put you on paper cause it's easy to sell,
and i threw it out when it started to smell.

When we die we turn to gasoline (x4)

(kick ass bridge and outro)

now for the year or two since that's been floating on air waves, no one really understood it and i was even accused of just making up gibberish that was funny/cool to hear. but i assure you all it has a special meaning to me that involves lame emo feelings that i can relate to in the past couple days when I was doing some stupid crap.

in other news, i work at a gas station; so it also kind of relates to me that literal way. so i'm gonig to ask you something right now, for the love of Lincolns ghost, don't EVER go into a gas station and try and make some stupid joke about the "ridiculous" price of gas. i have to hear that 500 times a day, their not funny, your only going to get a pity laugh at best that is so ripe with sarcasm your likely to feel like a totally jack ass. and you should. other than that, and everyone doing stupid shit and getting mad at me like its my fault, the jobs ok. i get to work 2 over-nights a week and those are great. its like in clerks when Randal says "this job would be great if not for the customers." i literally play my old game boy and write.

and that's the best transition your going to get into my recent professional (hahaha) work. talk about meta-discourse. well I've mostly been working on the pilot to my independent series I'm currently working on. and fans of my work (again , hahaha) know that I've done silly shit like this before which never panned out. but my response to that is that i never actually got to scripting those, so I'm actually a lot further along than i have been at getting my spit together. not to mention the fine-fine folks i know in BG who are sure to help me should i finish a script and want to take it through the process of production. in fact i already have some actors in mind for certain characters (Dustin Meadows = the king of the hobos) the other thing i was intent on doing this summer was a spec script to the Disney channel original show "The Emperors New School" in order to be submitted with an application to the ABC writers fellowship program... but thats due in like 2-3 weeks.... so maybe next year. also been jotting down sketch ideas for my triumphant return as (co)head of writing staff for the Bad Genetics Comedy.

other than that and trying to make people hate me, I've been trying to get ready to go back to school (moving in August 16th). i still need like loans and other important stuff, but what ever. it's still summer and I've got beer in the fridge.

so thats the first kind of real post, hope it was as good for you as it was for me. back to listening to rave music and wondering why i can't fall asleep.

Tuesday, July 8, 2008

Have I got the look that, gets the looks?

Ok, changed the puke / neon green colors to something more classy, and put in some current pictures. Hopefully making it look nice will make me want to post more. One of the problems I’m having is coming up with a cool blog name that lets you know who I am and what I do. so far all I can think of is "what's Koch-ing?'" but even on the chance that people know my last name is pronounced "cook" and get the connection, its still incredibly cheesy and lame. So i'm'a just stick with the all business, straight up in your face, SFK:B or Simon F. Koch: Blog, unless you want to write me with a suggestion. I’ll even make a contest out of it. The person who helps me find a hip new title will win a free autographed copy of my self published comic book.... that I plan to release sometime in the next 2 years. I have about 4 pages done now.

Well that’s all for now, just a short update since I posted 2 days ago.

Lates.

Monday, July 7, 2008

I'm Back Baby... and i promise to do something about this color scheme

I was searching my own name in Google (like I often do) and found this, after a year and a half of not using it. So feeling like an abusive parent (the children are web accounts in this metaphor) I decide to write a blogtry (blog + entry = blogtry.... it’s called a portmanteau). now blogging isn't something new for me... regular blogging would be but I'm not making any promises, my point is I, until this point, would post my 4-5 yearly blog entries on MySpace... however, since I got my computer at a Turkish bazaar and it has a hard time viewing things with flash, and since MySpace has converted to a format that is pretty much flash embedded with more flash, this means it takes me about 45 seconds to log onto MySpace.... unacceptable ... I mean if I wanted to wait 45 seconds for something I'd put in a microwave burrito (the joke is that I'm fat). So I'm declaring here that I am officially done with MySpace (only 2 years after everybody else, right). So now if you want to know what going on with the life of will-be superstar Simon F. Koch (I changed my middle name to "Fucking") you’re going to have to come here, to this respectable blog joint. Now if you’ll excuse me I’m going to go post blog on MySpace about the new blog address… if I don’t post again in 48 hours notify the police.

p.s. sorry for the Jim Gaffigan–esque interruptions (these) but its something I do (because it’s the easiest and cheapest way of inserting some kind of comic relief) … (what a lazy fuck)